TO LIVE AND DIVORCE IN LA

by Dennis Hensley

 

Santa Monica family law attorney Lynn Soodik was almost in tears herself. As her client, Mrs. X, an established Hollywood actress, opened up to the court about her troubled marriage to Mr. X, also an actor, her emotions got the better of her and a Lifetime movie worthy blubber-fest ensued. “She was on the stand crying and you could really feel for her,” Soodik recalls. “You had all this empathy for her and all of the sudden, I looked at her and she winked at me. I thought, ‘Oh my God, she’s even fooling me’!”

Welcome to divorce, Hollywood style. In a city built on illusions, where many people make their living pretending to be people they’re not, one of the biggest illusions of all is that love’s going to last forever. And while Tinseltown doesn’t exactly have a monopoly on good-love-gone-bad (just ask New Yorkers Rudy Gulianni and Donald Trump), there are a number of key factors that, when combined, can make the train ride from L.A. to Splitsville it’s own peculiar and often harrowing journey.
For starters, the money’s usually bigger, a lot bigger. Amy Irving reportedly received $100 million when she divorced Steven Spielberg. Cindy Costner left Kevin with $80 million. Then there’s the granddaddy of all celeb divorce settlements; the Neil and Marcia Diamond split in 1994 in which she walked away with a reported $150 million. Talk about your Love on the Rocks.
“Los Angeles probably has more substantial asset divorces than anywhere in the country,” observes Dennis Wasser, the high-powered attorney who represented Tom Cruise in his divorce from Nicole Kidman as well as such A-list clients as Steven Speilberg, Clint Eastwood and Jane Fonda. “There are a lot of very wealthy people here, a lot of whom made a lot of money at a young age.”

And when you’re young and in love, getting a pre-nuptial agreement can be seen as downright unromantic, though that, says Wasser, is changing. “In countries like France and South Africa, pre-nups are part of everyday life,” he says. “People in the U.S. are getting more sophisticated and we’re seeing more pre-nups in California than ever before.” Sometimes the provisions of these agreements can be as unique as the personalities involved. In Don Johnson’s pre-nup with Melanie Griffith, he reportedly agreed to stay faithful if she agreed to stay slim. Catherine Zeta-Jones, according to a London paper, gets a cool $5 million if Michael Douglas is ever caught cheating.

The drastic way in which fortunes can rise and fall overnight also sets L.A. divorces apart. When Jennifer Lopez divorced her first husband, waiter Ojani Noa, in 1998, after two years, he reportedly received $50,000. Four years later, when she ended her second marriage to choreographer Cris Judd after only ten months, she was a superstar and Judd, according to Us Weekly, left with $10 million in his dance bag. “If someone’s making 10 or 20 million a picture, and getting back-end participation, and they get divorced, the spouse is entitled to half of that,” explains Soodik who represented Meg Ryan in her divorce from Dennis Quaid. And because California is a community property state, the court automatically divides everything 50-50, unless there’s a pre-nup. “So in Hollywood,” Soodik concludes, “you can be married for a miniscule amount of time and then be compensated more money than most people earn in their whole life.”

It’s not just the super rich who have money problems. Mr. Y was a regular on his first hit series when his divorce went through. A few years later, his show got cancelled and though he’s hardly worked since, his support payments are based on his previous thousands-of-dollars-per-episode salary. “In that case, you can always go in later to modify your payment,” says Soodik, “but in L.A., you don’t want to say, “I don’t think that I’m going to make that kind of money again,’ because that’s not the Hollywood attitude.”

Then there’s the case of Mr. Z, a hardscrabble bartender and aspiring screenwriter. His wife wanted a house-with-the-picket-fence kind of life, decided she wasn’t going to get it from him, so together they filed for a summary divorce. (In California, a couple is eligible for a summary divorce they are married less than five years and have no assets together.) A few weeks before the divorce was final, Mrs. Z’s father reads in the newspaper that Mr. Z has just sold his first script for million dollars. He calls his daughter, they immediately go to court to prevent the divorce and then she, on her way out the door, gets enough money to open her own white picket fence outlet store.

And then there are the only-in-Hollywood “lifestyle” considerations. Just recently, Jim Carrey’s ex-wife, Melissa, requested more money in support to fund, among other things, a personal trainer and Pilates room for their teenage daughter. MGM mogul Kirk Kerkorian pays his ex, Lisa Bonder Kerkorian, over $50,000 in child support monthly for such must-haves as French Lessons and equestrian activities, even though DNA tests proved that her daughter isn’t his. “When you start horse trading ranches and boats and artwork in the millions, it’s another world,” says Harvey Levin, the executive producer of the syndicated series Celebrity Justice and a former legal columnist for the L.A. Times. “It’s like ‘I’ll give you the Picasso, if you give me the Renoir.’ I have to say, though, in ordinary divorces, things can get just as crazy. Maybe they’re they’re fighting over a pet turtle and not a Renoir, but the turtle is really a symbol of the anger between the two people. Well, so’s the Renoir.”

“I was involved in a case where the couple spent something like $200,000 litigating the issue of ‘What is the value of the use of a private jet’,” recalls Soodik. “The wife said ‘I need to be able to use the private jet,’ and the judge thought he was being very smart and diplomatic and he said, ‘Okay, anytime you want to travel, your husband will have to buy out all of first class so that you feel that you’re in a private jet.’ She looked at him and said, ‘But your honor, it’s not the same. Commercial airlines don’t leave when I want to leave’.”

Take-no-prisoners private detectives, like Anthony Pellicano and Gavin de Becker, can also play a role in Hollywood divorces—but less often than one might think because California is a No Fault state. “So it’s not about who slept with who because that’s irrelevant under no fault,” says Levin. “It’s about how much money do you really have?” So a P.I. is more likely to spend his time chasing paper trails that scanning through stolen sex tapes? “Yes, though that stuff happens, too,” says Levin. “Somebody came to us recently with something really awful in a family law matter but we always pass because it’s just dirty. I keep waiting for it to turn up somewhere else but it hasn’t yet.”

The social fall-out from a divorce can also be more hard-hitting in Hollywood than other places. “Even if both people are stars, it still becomes about, ‘Who do I want at my dinner party, him or her’?” says Levin. “What’s really sad is when people call a restaurant or something and say, ‘I’m the former Mrs. So and So,’ and use the other person’s first and last name. It’s like where’s your identity?”

Not that everyone that goes through a divorce in Hollywood comes out looking worse than they did going in. Every once in a while, someone flourishes. “Divorce certainly didn’t hurt Nicole Kidman much, did it?” poses Levin. “She did a fabulous job managing her image during that difficult time and I think it resonated with the public.”

Ah yes, the public. Of all the quirks and wrinkles that make divorce in L.A. different from Anywhere Else, U.S.A., the most significant, by far, is the fishbowl factor. In Hollywood, a divorce not just between you and your lying, cheating, insensitive spouse. It’s between you, your lying, cheating, insensitive spouse and Entertainment Tonight. “When a big time movie star gets divorced, people are interested,” says Wasser, “so the divorces are often more difficult because of the added stress and strain of the publicity.”

The relentless public scrutiny explains why most high-profile couples, like Cruise and Kidman for example, settle privately rather than air their differences in a public courtroom. “That case started to get a little bit ugly,” observes Levin, “and then I think everybody realized, ‘Wow, look at the road we’re going down,’ and they made it amicable and private and they served everybody well by doing that.”

Usually in such settlements, a retired judge is hired to conduct trial-like proceedings in someone’s conference room or hotel suite. Sometimes he even wears a robe. “It can be quite comical,” says Soodik, “when somebody is in front of a judge and they’re saying, ‘I need $300,000 a month and my cook and my dog walker and I need all these things. And this judge is thinking, ‘I earn maybe $100,000 a year and I have a wife a two kids and you want $300,000 a month?’” One plus to handling divorces in Hollywood is that because most big players have business managers, their records are far better organized than your average joe. “I was working on a divorce for someone in the music industry,” recalls Soodik, “and every time we’d say, ‘We need this,’ he’d look over to his business manager and say, ‘Take care of that. Got that? Take care of that.’ It was like a cartoon.”

The media glare can also affect what evidence is presented in these cases. “There are times that people don’t use information that would be helpful to them because they know it’s going to be in the public eye,” explains Soodik. “Say you’re the non-Hollywood person and you want to bring something up that’s going to hurt your spouse’s career. Well, you have to think twice about it because that can affect your support.”

But it’s not just about keeping their business out of the papers. Image-conscious celebrities and their spurned spouses have gotten incredibly crafty about using the media to serve their interests in a divorce case. “I’ve seen filings in family law where you read it and think, ‘This wasn’t for the judge, this was for the press,” says Levin. “In one situation, two stars were fighting over visitation and the ‘opulent lifestyle’ of one side was mentioned in a way where I thought, ‘This is not to argue visitation, this is to show excess’.”

What’s more, stars and their lawyers and publicists are getting into the act, commenting on the record more than ever before. “It used to be, couples would put up the wall of silence because there wasn’t an outlet for this kind of information,” says Levin. “But now, with so many cable networks and entertainment magazines, they know that this stuff gets out there anyway so they’re jumping into the fray early on and spinning it in a way that best serves their client’s image. If the client doesn’t look good at the end of the divorce, regardless of how good the financial settlement is, they’ve failed. It’s not just about what happens in court. It’s what happens in the court of public opinion.”

Given the legal and PR tightrope they must constantly traverse, it is no wonder the top Hollywood divorce lawyers make anywhere from $500 to $800 an hour. It’s also not surprising that they’ve taken on almost mythological status, with nicknames like the Gunslinger, the Stealth Lawyer and The Darth Vader of Hollywood. “Being the best divorce lawyer in New York is like being the best devil in hell,” divorcing publishing maven Judith Regan once quipped and though some may believe the same of Hollywood split-brokers, Levin maintains that, at very the top, the opposite is true. “There are some family law lawyers who will kind of keep the fight going because the longer these cases go, the more money they make,” he observes, “but when you talk about the lawyers who represent celebrities, it’s the opposite. I can think of one custody case where a top family law attorney could have ridden it for twelve years and made hundreds of thousands of dollars but instead he referred it out to another state and the case settled within months. If you bleed a client dry, that person can trash you in Hollywood and it takes about four of those people to ruin your practice. In the end, stars are people and most people don’t want to play out a bitter, acrimonious divorce. They don’t want to live through it let alone make it public. The best lawyers in Hollywood understand that.”

And what’s more, they make house calls. “If somebody is seen coming to my office, it can end up in the National Enquirer,” reveals Soodik, “so I more often go to them, which I have to say is fun because you get to see their house.” And after the grand tour, you sit down and listen as the spill their deepest, darkest secrets. “If you’re a voyeur,” Soodik says, “this would be the most appropriate job to satisfy that.”


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